Unbitten, unshy.

I can't wait until Christmas.

This year, it is going to be so sweet.

Not because of the neato presents. Not because it means I have another chance to catch Santa in a complex series of ever more elaborate and cunning traps. Not because of the cookies. Okay, a lot because of the cookies. But mostly because all this election hoofapoo will be behind us. Actually, I can't wait until Thanksgiving. Hell, how about November 5th?

I know we will still be toiling in these smoldering economic ruins, still be under the so called leadership of a blind idiot leashed to a war mongering idealog, still be wondering how the hell to fix... everything.

But we will be that much closer to 2009. Big deal, you say. So what. Well, if Obama is elected I believe there will be a massive period of national relief - a three month long exhale as we wait for the inauguration. If that other one gets the nod, we will spend three months sucking it in and waiting until... the end of days.

Sound grim?

I don't really believe in the end of days crap. Sort of a skeptic there. The Mayans had some interesting ideas on that topic. I'll preface this next statement by saying don't think that there is anything wrong with being a republican. But I do believe that a continued republican regime will do nothing for one of our most precious commodities - American Optimism. The spirit of that optimism is the foundation for so many other wonderful American ideals; ingenuity, pluck, open minds, open hearts. The will to do the right thing, in spite of personal sacrifice. Right now our system feeds the greedy heart with no consequence. There is a poison tree growing in our garden, and we need to carve it out.

I just don't see any such correction coming out of a McCain/Palin administration. McCain is a warrior at heart, not a gardener, not a community leader. And he has no clue what a real "middle class" is. I admit that civilization needs fighters, but not as leaders. Fighters are needed to fight off the other fighters out there. That's a bitch, but I chalk it up to human nature, though most humans I know don't go out looking for fights. Our move toward the violent act is primarily a defensive tack. Most humans I know just want to get along, and even help out the others.

But since we're talking politics - I think it is high time one of these candidates steps up and gives us the bad news. America needs a hard slap on the face, a kick in the pants, maybe even a swirly. The dog that bites first bites the softest spot. That spot is our greed, in conjunction with complacency which has been fattened by undeserved wealth. Or credit, as they call it. I am willing to take a good hard bite in the greed if it means we improve our nation's current condition, improve the state of the world we live in, improve the perception the rest of the world has of us. F*** Bush for everything he has undone for us. What a rotten waste of time.

Flat busted

It made me blind with rage last night that both candidates brought me back to my middle school days.

Remember when you figured out that acting stupid made you more popular? You gave a right answer, started getting good grades. And some other kids (maybe Joe Six-Pack), kids who couldn't or wouldn't try to get the right answer - they took the offensive. They attacked. Called the smart kids "geeks," or "nerds." They got laughs from the rest by teasing the kids who succeeded.

And suddenly, it was game on.

To be average, to fit in, became most important. And at a certain age too, little girls realized they are treated differently from boys - held to a different standard. Nothing makes me more frustrated than when I see a little girl realize being cute and coy rewards her with what she wants...they suddenly realize that being feminine buys them some power. They figure out, well, if I'm going to be held back anyway, I'm not going to fight. I'll play along. Like when women know they can win an argument by crying.

It's offensive to me the Republican party would not only hold Palin up as an example of feminism, but that everyone else looks the other way and plays along.


No one attacked her daughter's choice (ding ding ding, there's that word) to keep her baby, it was off-limits. No one could point out the irony that maaaaaaybe that whole "teaching abstinence" thing ain't working if your daughter's preggers. It was, "Don't pick on her!" Sure, if she didn't want to limit others' reproductive choices, it WOULDN'T be fair. But she does. So it is.

As for the first VP debate last night, the bar for Palin was set so low the fact she made it onstage was applauded. And she was off-limits. Biden couldn't and didn't address how evasive and superficially vague her answers were. He couldn't and didn't take her to task about misrepresenting herself, that she couldn't find Main Street with a freaking map. If he had done those things, he would have been accused of picking on her. No, he had to pick on McCain instead, and she had free reign to say whatever she wanted. It came across weakening his side.

Even the moderator had been accused of being biased, thanks to working on a book about African-Americans in politics. Because she has written about Obama, the right got huffy it wasn't fair, waaaaah. So she lobbed softballs as well.

The end result = Palin was treated with kid gloves last night.



Feminism is NOT about being treated differently. It's not about going easier on a lady, or giving her special breaks.

Feminism is about being treated equally.


Palin's biggest strengths are often listed as (in order of importance):
1. her looks
2. her toughness against unarmed animals
3. the fact she's pro-created
4. that she has held an office (probably made possible by #1)

You know what? If that's how people see your strengths...you're not the best person to represent feminism. So stop being so smug, Missy, thinking you're the movement's poster child. You're setting it back.

If we were choosing a reality tv show host, sure, then half of those qualifications above would apply.

I could even imagine people feeling sorry for her in her Couric and Gibson interviews, like they felt sorry for (or - gulp - related to) W.

"Don't pick on them! They're not your intellectual elite! They're like us! They're trying!"





You're right. They're extremely trying.

It's like Ferguson said on his late-night hootenanny recently - I don't want a leader who's like me. I want a leader who's a million times SMARTER than me. Someone successful. Someone who intimidates the fuck out of me, who gets more done than I ever will.

But it seems a lot of people in this country still want to make fun of the geek's accomplishments to make themselves feel better about their own deficiencies.

I fear this country is, once again, going to choose a leader based on who they'd like to get a beer with, who looks good with the sound down...not on who's best qualified to lead us out of this shit-storm.


Picture of Sarah Palin, provided to the AP by her family. The shirt, reportedly one of Palin's favorites, says "I may be broke but, I'm not flat busted." Yep. It's got improper punctuation on it. And it's a boob joke! Get it?

Doggone It

I watched the v.p. debates last night how everyone should have watched it: with two hyper-intelligent, very funny lesbians.

We ate, discussed, joked, and every now and then, fell silent listening to the tv, as one of us muttered something along the lines of "we're doomed" and took a sip of wine.

We were going to abort some babies and offer them to our lord Satan, but we were too tired. You know, school night and all.

For serious, though, it was a pretty liberal room, not surprisingly. It's interesting my friends probably live in a tax bracket that would benefit from some Republican policies. They've worked their tails off, and have earned a pretty comfortable lifestyle. Because they don't flaunt it, I don't feel like the odd man out when I'm around them.

By the way, when Sarah Palin talked about not raising taxes vs. Obama wanting to, she sorta omitted the people McCain wouldn't raise taxes for are the nation's top earners. (You know, like his wife.)

So as I surveyed this beautiful urban apartment, it was clear my friends could maybe benefit from some wealthy-people tax breaks. However their morals, not their wallet, guide their political leanings.

It was satisfying to take part in a social atmosphere that would make Sarah Palin verrrrrry uncomfortable. And I'm not just saying it's because my friends are lesbians. Hell, she'd probably wink at them too, they're very charming.

I'm talking about all the big words we used. We used irony - I think that would go over Ms. Palin's head.

More later. I gotta work.


Palin and her sole gay fan hold a "craziest eyes" contest.

Average? You call that average?

She remains a fool who dodges, flounders, and comes up well short of Yahtzee. She ranks her family among average Americans, but let us not be fooled. That would only apply if the majority of us were members of a family with a dimwitted and overpaid politician in the household. Where does this notion come from, anyway?

They found Steve Fosset's plane the other day. Every single report I heard or read described him as "Millionaire Steve Fosset". I thought his first name was Steve. The guy did many, many outstanding things, things which surely helped him become a millionaire, but things that represent the character of a person far more than how much money they have in the bank. It is truly disappointing that popular figures like Fosset are so commonly described primarily by their financial standing. May he rest in peace.

I think that is part of the subtext for our current crisis. Money is everything these days. And, as we see so plainly from the debate tonight, money makes bull shit walk, talk, and spray runny lies all over the room. I am not saying money is all it took to put Palin in her current position, but that it reinforces her skewed perception of what the real American majority regards as wealthy. She thinks she is average? You gotta be kidding.

I am pulling for some Schadenfreude tonight.

Sorry, Tina.

Next time, Ms. Silverman.







This is the funniest woman on television.

Fingers crossed she keeps the bits coming tonight in the 1st veep debate.

Yes, pull up a kindergarten classroom chair, won't you?

I'm just here for the cheese.

Welcome to the peach

This is one hell of a time to be alive.

Economy in crisis. Idiots in charge. Would be wannabes a heart beat away from something that would steamroll them like nothing we've ever seen. Practicing the yakkity-yak in a Sedona backyard. People who say we have enough oil to... do what exactly? With 3% of the global supply? And moon pies. Must not forget the moon pies. And those awesome suction cup handles that are saving fat fucks from getting stranded in slippery places all over the country. Truly an amazing time to be an American.